By Faith Carrillo, Brown Girls Do Ballet Ambassador

In any profession – particularly in dance, it can be easy to get overwhelmed. We as dancers can get so caught up in the stress of “being perfect” that we forget to take care of ourselves. If we neglect self-care, that stress can build up and we can lose our motivation. We can also forget that our whole lives do not have to be placed on hold for our work. Dance is very time- consuming and even though it is our passion, we need to remember that we can still grow, set new goals, and have new experiences outside of the dance world.

Fortunately, there are many ways to stay in the right mindset and refresh our bodies, so we can find new ambitions to accomplish. Recently, I spoke with Constance Stamatiou, professional dancer with Alvin Ailey Dance Theater. She shared some tips on how to balance work and personal life, while keeping yourself healthy both physically and mentally.

*Photo: Constance Stamatiou; shot by Paul Kolnik*

When pursuing a career in dance, how do you stay motivated in the audition process for companies?

I trust the process. I stay focused in class making the best out of my technique so that I am confident in what I’m asked of. For me, the calmer I am the better I perform. I have a lot of energy, so a good workout, some meditation and some good music beforehand helps me.

How do you avoid getting overwhelmed and stay in the right mindset when dealing with the overall stress of professional work?

Breathing is so important. I feel like the rush of NYC - and even being a mom trying to get my kids to school and myself to work - is a lot, so I get to work early so I can lay down and breathe for a few minutes, then a floor barre. It’s my “me time.” It calms me; it’s like pressing the reset button.

When I get home, I study videos so I can remember my steps, get more acquainted with the music, and see what steps I can do better. Maybe there’s some musicality I want to play with. I’m sure you’ve heard the saying “You have to eat, breathe, sleep for the love of dance.” My body is a vessel. I need to feed it, sleep well, strengthen it, stretch it. Self-care is just as huge to regenerate my muscles, so I like Epsom salt baths, massages, rolling on the foam roller, cupping and acupuncture.

Tell us about how you balance dancing and parenthood. What was it like coming back into company work after having children?

It’s extremely difficult. My husband is a wonderful father who takes extra care of our kids when I’m on tour. I FaceTime my kids numerous times a day. I even read to them and help with homework. When I’m home I attend every practice and performance of theirs. Birthdays, I try to be there in person or fly them where I am. However, if anything comes up, emergency or not, I let my job know and they’re pretty understanding.

I was in my 20’s when I first was with Ailey before my kids. I was young and just wanted to dance and travel. After my kids, being in my 30s and with a different body, I have more work to do - not only with raising my kids and being there for them, but I also had to learn how to be there for myself. I had to work out more, self-recover more, I have to plan ahead and be more organized with my time. I have more life experience and I truly feel since becoming a mother it has made me a better dancer, and being a dancer makes me a better mom. I have a family who taught me what unconditional love is, and doing what I love I hope will inspire my kids to aspire to do what they dream of and love.

While being part of a company, what are your goals? Do most of them revolve around dance or do you enjoy discovering new passions?

During my time at Ailey, I strive to never be complacent. I believe with hard work I can continue to grow and be an even better dancer. I want to inspire my peers and help pass along information that was passed onto me. That’s how we keep Mr. Ailey’s legacy alive. Being in this company has made many dreams and goals come true, from traveling around the world, to appearing on TV, magazines - all kinds of cool things I only imagined.

I do enjoy new passions; I’ve always gone to the gym, but my passion for fitness really picked up after having my kids. I just love to be active; I was also a competitive gymnast when I was younger. I enjoy boxing. I also train in Taekwondo (whenever my schedule allows me). I’m a junior black belt! Dance has also brought me to discover gyrotonics and Pilates. I wish there were more hours in the day to do them all.

What’s your favorite motto, quote, tip, or something you live by?

It takes a strategic battle to win the war. I think oftentimes we think about the finish line but not what it takes to get us there. We have to start with our thoughts and make plans and see them through before we can successfully cross that finish line.

Do not compare yourself to others. You’re defeating yourself by doing that. We all have something to give. We are all capable. Some may have it easier or more natural, but put in the work and you will reap the benefits. However, putting in the work takes time, so be patient and know you are being seen - but most importantly, I need you to see you!

Do you have anything else you want to say to dancers who are reading this article?

Love yourself. Know that you are enough. Your body hears you; it hears your thoughts, so be kind, work hard, and persevere with grace and grit.

Constance Stamatiou began dancing at 5 years old and trained in a wide variety of styles. She was a fellowship student at the Ailey School and trained in ballet, pointe, jazz, Graham and Horton. From 2005 to 2007, she was an Ailey ll member, and in 2007 became a member with Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater.

You can follow Constance’s dance journey on Instagram and TikTok. Check out AAADT’s 2023 tour schedule to find out when Constance will perform in a city near you!

Dance-Life Balance: An Interview with Constance Stamatiou

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